Wednesday, June 6, 2007

A Better Day

"The price is wrong bitch." 

“I l-left a message.  A message? What number did you call?  Two, four, niner, five, six, seven… I can’t hear you, you’re trailing off and did I catch a niner in there? Were you calling from a walkie-talkie?  No, it was cordless.  You know what? Don’t. Not here, not now.”-Tommy Boy

First I just want to say thank you to everyone who left me comments on yesterday's vent.  It's nice to see how supportive all of you are.  Yesterday was a much better day and he was trying to be really nice to her.  I think he realized how he came across because I could see him making a real effort with her.  I'm completely over it and I don't hold any grudges against him, but I will say I hope the next time he will be more considerate before making a comment like that again.

The one trend I have noticed from being in church and from some comments are how any type of comments made can stop someone from ever stepping foot in a church again.  I remember in high school our youth pastor left and eventually I started going to my friends church.  Well after visiting for a few weeks I was basically told that I could not show up to youth anymore because of the clothes I wore.  Now I was 18 but it's not like I dressed like a whore or anything.  My shirts were snug but that was the style and pretty much still is and it's not like my boobs were popping out because well I'm a B cup so there you go.  As for my skirts they were above my knee but my butt wasn't hanging out.  Basically I criticized because some of the youth knew I went to parties and drank, and I guess they told the youth pastor and he decided to use that and how I dressed to tell me why I was not welcomed.  I guess he thought I was going to turn the youth into a bunch of drunken whores.  When I found this out I was so mad I wanted to go up and punch that guy in the face, and the other part of me was hurt because I was judged without knowing who I really was.  After that I quit going to church but every once in awhile I would go.  It took me almost 5 years before I recommitted my life and found a church that I liked.  The church I went to and still go to is the one David grew up in.  To say the least they are charismatic but after some time I got used to it and I'm glad that I can worship however I want without being judged.  But what sealed the deal was that David and I were married while I was 4 months pregnant with Sweet Pea.  We were scared to death to tell our parents and of course the Pastor since we had already planned to get married but now we pushed everything up.  The Pastor married us without looking down or telling us how terrible we were.  If he had condemned us I probably would have turned my back on church all together.  But he didn't and because of that I have been able to forgive that youth pastor and can move forward in my life and have learned to not judge others.

I just have to tell myself that we are all human and we all make mistakes.  Unfourtunetly our mistakes can cause others to never step foot in a church again.  As Christians people hold us to a much higher standard and think that we are perfect and should never make mistakes.  Well I hate to break the news but Christians are just like everyone else, we make mistakes and we learn from them just like everyone else.  We stumble and fall and sometimes hurt others without meaning to.


Catwoman said...

I can't believe you were treated that way when you were 18! Instead of shunning you, you'd think they'd welcome you into their community and hope to show you the "right" path. What a wasted opportunity to change someone's life! (Not that your life needed that much changing, since you obviously turned out just fine, I'm just saying that there are kids who would have been so angered by that, that they would have turned to a life with a lot more drinking, a lot more sleeping around and maybe even drugs. And it would have been on that pastor's head!)

Unfortunately, some people are judgemental and you can't change anything about their behavior. You just control your own. I'm glad you've found a church that makes you happy.

chris said...

I understand how that made you felt. Having been raised in a religious home I have seen much of the hypocrisies and poor way the so called 'Christians' deal with others when they don't like their way of life. But you are right, we are all human. And as long as we do the best we can possibly do and make our best attempt to accept others for all what they are, then we are all doing our best.